Monday, December 20, 2010

The Blues

NICU Day #22 of 127

OOUUCCHHHH! What now? The nurse is telling me that I have to have another blood transfusion. They can’t find any good veins, so they put the needle in my scalp. It doesn’t feel very good, where are my mommy and daddy?

I can feel mommy sitting near my box. There will be no holding today because of the transfusion. The doctors and nurses are adjusting my medicine because I started my ABC’s yesterday. A=Apnea (stop breathing for at least 20 seconds), B=Bradycardia (low heart rate) and C= Cyanosis (blue baby). This is normal they tell us, but it sure feels like my health is sliding backwards instead of making progress.

Mommy looks very sad. She opens up the portholes and touches my tummy. She is staring out the window next to my bed watching the rain and the wind. She says it’s a terrible autumn day, and that pretty soon it will be winter. She remembers checking into the hospital at the end of the summer and watching the summer turn to fall. She wonders aloud how many seasons will she witness while she sits at this window. When will I go home? Will I ever go home?

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